tragedy

star wars episode III is so incredibly heart breaking. I didn't cry though. and Yoda is still a little cute green thing that's wise and powerful and lovable. Anakin... well, he's just a big disappointment. I knew he'd become bad, but oh, what tragedy. it's really incredibly heart breaking. and how the jedi were betrayed. oh I could barely handle it when the children tried to fight back and got killed.
the plot was developed really well.

things

oooh, ritalin. give me ritalin. I need ritalin.
I'm proud of my invention! I might even be able to market it. oh, then I can make money. oh, money, to save up and get my xbox 360.
I need to go read my book now.

goodbyes

'come with me.'
'now you know I can't.'
it's natural to feel sad when saying goodbye. oh, I need to watch star wars really bad.
lamb chops, tortellini, lamb chops, tortellini, lamb chops, tortellini. juice. juice. water. meat. meat. meat. meat. meat. meat. meat.
oh dinner was really good.

loud

it is true in some way. you'll hear me before you see me.
I spent my free period looking through the window of the classroom and smiling like a cheshire cat to scare the teacher.
WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Insects that camouflage themselves as chocolate aren't very smart.
woohoo. I am getting good at this school thing. and this whole music thing, I was born for it. I have an affinity, a 'natural ability'. what do I want to do with it? I still have the same goal.
To God be the glory.

the Don

foolish mortals! you cannot outsmart the Don!

change

love is repulsive. relationships are repulsive and just fucked up. oh, I just wrote a bad word. maybe I'm going mad because this is not how love is supposed to be. because inner me is being rebellious and saying no, love is not shitty, it's a good thing. oh. internal struggle.

all hail the don

yeah, that's right. bow before the all powerful Don Eunarco!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

guess what

My life rocks.

unbalanced

I want to be little again. I want to be picked up and swung around and not have a care. I want to escape.
and the other side of me says thinks, escape? no, I don't need to escape, I can deal with things. because I don't want to run away like some helpless escapist.
I know what will make me feel better. I think I'll vent on my drums. shut that damn phantom of the opera music off, turn on the punk rock.

determination

I have to admit, I'm scared.
I wonder if there's something wrong with my brain, cause I can't pick up what the teachers are saying when they talk fast. I'm scared because I don't really understand. I don't like not understanding. so this means, I gotta work harder. ok. work harder. work.
or maybe I'm disturbed because I keep dreaming that I get shot or that arrows get shot into my chest. or that knives are being thrown at me.

shudder

I had a nightmare last night. some guy liked me and I liked him back. ugh. good think I woke up before all the messed up crap started. but not before I died. I dreamt that I died.

relieve pain

I feel sad. I decided to learn well. study hard and learn my music well, because maybe if I get good one day, I'd be able to make people feel better if I played for them. music has great power, and maybe I'd be able to relieve pain if I played well. because it's special when you play for someone, just so they know you're playing for them.

love like

what do I like?
I like juniper trees.
I like berries and cream.
I love white lilies and sunflowers.
I love my family of course.
I love the perckies [sc percussion]
I like jam.
I pretty much love food.
peaches, eggs, lamb, hummus, texas chilli, moms cooking, salt and vinegar chips, olive oil and good bread, sultana cookies, macadamia nut butter, peanut butter, fried chicken, barbequed chicken, sashimi, japanese food in general, apple deserts [ like the apple crumble at swensens], bananas, mangos, anything chocolate
I like green and white.
I like fresh air.
I love music.
I like star gazing.
I like roasted marshmallows over a campfire.
I like hot chocolate on a cold day.
I like pasta.
I love flowers.
I love cookies.
I adore cake.
I love pie. apple, blueberry, chicken, pumpkin, lemon meringue, black berry, coconut cream, banana cream. yes, pie.
I like warm clothes in winter.
I like red and black.
I love animals. except snakes. except bugs.
I like cherry blossoms in spring.
I like trees in mid autumn.
I like coconuts. the water inside, the white flesh, coconut shavings, coconut cream pie.
I love chocolate.
I love meat.
I love shopping with friends or close family.
I love christmas.
I love christmas with mom's side of the family.
I adore cousins andrea, donald, derek, kelvin.
I like pudding.
I like milk.

shut up

If you're not going to do any thing about it, suffer in silence. It's annoying when people complain to get attention or complain just for the sake of complaining. spare me. I don't need to hear about some petty insincere misfortune, especially when I'm trying to get my work done.
maybe I'm being selfish. Can you blame me for wanting to stop my ears? complaining about not being able to support your brothers distant friends at a match? that's fresh.
I seem cold because I am so annoyed being forced to listen to it. Am I expected to give pity when it's obviously insincere? no way. I am impatient. I have no patience for that.
I don't like pretentious flakes.

ponder

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

-robert frost

stop

Stop whining, and get a grip. I can't stand it. just sitting there in your little pool of misery and whining to everyone, secretly wanting them to pull you out of there. no, no one is going to help, because the little pool of misery thing is just repulsive. and then what happens? you sink deeper into your pool. no, you gotta get yourself out of there, get it done yourself. If you don't help yourself, no one is going to help you. because the little pool of misery and self pity is just repulsive.

I need to follow that as well, I've been whining a lot lately. oh I get chills just thinking about it.